On the off-chance you're actually interested in redemption (the real hard stuff, as Hugo Schwyzer writes), I have an idea.
Step 1: Douse yourself with kerosene
Step 2: Admit that you are a hypocrite and sexual predator.
Step 3: Set up your webcam.
Step 4: Light a match.
It might not actually vindicate you, but at least you'll be serving a useful purpose for once, keeping others warm. And it might be entertaining for the rest of us.
Yes, I'm sadistic that way. But then, remember you're reading the blog of a woman who believes that abusive men should be shot in the street like the rabid dogs they are. Extreme? Totally, but so is beating someone to death and/or killing their spirit with words and manipulations.
Oh, and if I ever see you anywhere IRL? Start. Running.